This is going to sound REALLY STRANGE!!

When I paid my $250 application fee to Duke, they sent me a packet of information which included all of the post operative instructions. I made the decision a (week or so after the first of the year) that after the Braves Fanfest (weekend of the 12-13th) I would begin the liquid diet per the instructions given. I had an appointment with my nephrologist on Jan. 10th (where I weighed 293) and he OK'ed it with a modification on how much fluid I should drink. I started the diet on the morning of 1/15/08 and have lost 28 lbs, so far.

OK....now fast forward to yesterday. I totally fark up what time I'm supposed to meet Annie and Lee leaving Keith and I an hour to talk in the restaurant before they are supposed to arrive. Keith tells me "You're doing so well on this diet..... Do you think you ought to have the surgery?? You've gone through so much already....."

I think you ought to call Duke and see if you can put off the surgery for 6 months and see where you are then. "

That's a full blown WOW. (period)

To say I'm torn is the understatement of a lifetime. I've psyched myself up for "the day...." and now this!!

On one hand, I am really pleased with my progress (it seems to be right in line with others who have had the surgery-if not better) and am finding it relatively easy to stick to the liquid diet and "just say no." Even when the temptation is staring me in the face less than two feet away. I think (for the first time in my life) I'm seeing sucess and that I'll be able to reach my goal.

I am also thinking to myself that maybe in the past, i didn't give it my best for long enough to see results. I am also concerned that if I have the surgery I won't get to fully participate in things like going to the ballpark to take in a game and a Gerogia dog or going to Preggos (my fav Italian dig) for my anniversary and getting some wonderful pasta dish. Any and all events with my family center around everyone bringing some dish to share and eating. Can I balance healthy eating/exercise and only splurge on occasions and still keep the weight off?

Strangely enough, I'm not at all scared about the surgery itself. I've been off and on the operating room table so many times that I've stopped keeping count. I've also been septic and that's no fun!! I have complete faith in the DUKE staff and that's not a concern.

On the other hand, there is a ton of self doubt!! All the failures in the past, haunt me. Wondering if I did get the weight off, will I keep it off and knowing that it is also possible to eat around the surgery. I think of WLS surgery as the "permanent solution." But is it really if I can control my eating?

As you can see, I am really in a quandry!!

I feel I owe it to myself to give myself six more months and see where I am then.

I think I'm going to call DUKE and postpone my first appoinrtment for six months.

A not so cosmic Kelly!! (I hate decisions like these!!)

Flip-flops and cruel, cruel practical jokes!!

I was directed to a "Myspace" BLING PAGE (!!) this morning and started going through avatars, gifs and such!!

I find myself strangely attracted to this flip-flop gif.



I think it's because of a joke that Keith and I have where he's wanting to get me a pair of flip-flops for every major (and minor) holiday. He says we should go to the shoe store (or Wal-mart!!) and ask to be fitted for a pair of flip-flops. (funny in and of itself!!) Then, watch the face of the salesperson when they realize that I'm an amputee!! (No big toe or 2nd one on my right foot.) He really wants to exclaim "OMG!! What happened to her toes??" and see what reaction he gets!!

We're either really sick or have entirely too much time on our hands!!

Either way, it's why "we're so happy together!!"

Kelly :)

Inaugural Post

Two of my (most recent) favorite quotes by author, Scott D. Yost (County Editor at the famed Rhino Times) are when he was speaking of Coach Steve Spurier's desire to teach his athletes to "run for the ball" and force a fumble.

"We spend so much time focused on preparing for bad scenarios that we forget to
prepare for the good ones. We buy insurance; we save money; we keep medical
supplies in the cabinet – but are we doing all we can in our lives to prepare
for when good things happen?"

and

"Catch yourself every time you find yourself going "What's the point? This
or that will never happen – so why bother?"

Don't ever say, "My luck doesn't run that way." Maybe your luck doesn't run
that way because you're not open to it – and, anyway, even if your luck did run
that way, it wouldn't matter because you wouldn't be prepared and ready to
accept it and the luck would probably just fizzle out.

The word "luck" comes from a Scandinavian word meaning "To catch." Being
prepared for good things to happen – running to the ball – is the difference
between having good fortune fly right by you but miss you completely and – if
you are standing there prepared and alert, expectantly looking up in the sky
with a glove held up and open – being ready for the catch, so that when that big
break comes at you from out of nowhere, you'll be ready to snag it out of the
air, put it in your pocket and carry it with you."

So, now you know the reasoning behind naming this blog as I have. "Quest for the Best." is all about planning for the best case scenarios in life and how I am preparing for them.

Of late is my referral for gastric bypass surgery from two of my nephrologists (Drs. Colonardo and Detterding) to the Duke Weight Loss Center in Durham. On Friday, Septemeber 14th, 2007, I attended a mandatory seminar on weight loss surgery options. During the seminar, I learned basic information about both Lapband and Roux-en-Y Gastric Bypass surgeries, met previous paitents and gathered application materials.

I was kinda taken aback by the "seminar," as I had prepared (after talking with many Duke people on the phone) to be meeting "one-on-one" with one or two people at the most. When I arrived, (a few minutes late-due to traffic) I was greeted by a hospital conference room (ironically, situated right beside the cafeteria!!) jammed packed full of people!! I truly think the reason why they require a $250 application fee (which your insurance doesn't pay for) is to narrow down the number of people they have to process.

I took the paperwork home, read through it and decided it would be much quicker to apply online and pay the application fee with my debit card. So, I did. When you make a completely life altering decision like this one, you want to "get the show on the road" PDQ!! 6 or 7 weeks and quite few phone calls later, I got my special packet with information on how to proceed and the date of my first evaluation appointment. Feb. 7th, 2008 @ 8:00 am. An eternity away!! Well, at least they gave me a whole slew of medical test to complete (and keep me busy!!) until then.

More about the contents of the packet when we next meet.